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 "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"

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ymoilman2



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PostSubject: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 2:07 am

Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!


Posted by EXOGEN on April 1, 2015 at 1:25am

Just as the dinar speculators predicted, Iraq has re-valued its currency 1000-fold, making dollar-millionaires of ordinary folk from Anbar to Arkansas!


The unprecedented 100,000% revaluation was welcomed by businesses all across the world, who saw nothing strange about paying $1,000 today for something that was priced at $1 yesterday. At the stroke of a pen, foreign companies now pay their cleaning staff in Iraq more than they pay board-level directors back at home.

Dozens of ‘investors’ in America partied the night away, as news of their windfall came through.

Billy Bob, from Alabama, exclaimed: “I knew it would happen, just like the Lord said it would!” When asked why he only invested $1,000 if he knew it would revalue, he declined to comment.

Peggy Sue, of Butte, Montana, said:

“Wooo hooo!!! I knew if I just said ‘Go RV!’ one more time on an internet forum that it would somehow make it all come true – you just have to believe hard enough!”

Asked what she would do with her gains, she replied:

“I’m re-investing. Cousin Cletus buys his bait from the same guy as a director of Goldman Sachs, and he said that one day these rocks he sold me will turn into gold. I know it’s a long-shot, but the upside is so large it’s worth gambling on, and I’m only going to give him what I can afford to lose, and take a long-term view, so that makes sense, right? Hey, I’m an investor, and investors take risks, and I’d just hate myself if I missed a golden opportunity like that. Go rocks!!”

An Iraqi government official told us off the record:

“It’s so obvious, with hindsight – we should have done it sooner. All we had to do to be richer was to say the currency is now worth 1,000 times more, and everyone would be willing to pay 1,000 times more for it. I mean, wouldn’t you?”

But one dinar seller, who asked not to be named, said:

“I’m devastated! If I really thought this was going to happen, do you think I’d have sold dinars at the old price? What sort of an idiot was I!”

Meanwhile, a special sitting of the United Nations General Assembly has been called to discuss this unprecedented shift in global power.

The Central Bank of Iraq (CBI) has announced that the introduction of the new Iraqi currency has been further delayed due to teething problems with the cutting-edge technology that it will employ.

Radical new functionality including fingerprint recognition and near-field communication (NFC) promises to create a world-leading new monetary system, which will be the envy of governments around the world.

Several years of collaboration between the CBI, the World Bank, and Goldman Sachs, has made it possible to create a database to track the location and ownership of each dinar note, making the monitoring of transactions much easier.

Professor John Frink, of Springfield Heights Institute of Technology, who worked on the program, explained:

“Each note already has its own serial number, so it is a simple matter to set up a database to record the location and movement of each note.

“Near-field communication, which is already used in contact-less credit and debit cards, allows the notes to communicate with your mobile phone [cellphone] and relay information to our computers.

“Touch-sensitive paper can even record the user’s fingerprint, for additional peace of mind.“

A spokesman for the CBI, Dr al-Jolson, added:

“This is a new paradigm in the management of money supply, and probably the biggest development since fractional reserve banking.

“Electronic money is easy to monitor – we get daily logs of every transaction – but up to now, cash transactions were the missing link.

“The new system will make it so much easier for people to pay their taxes, both in Iraq and abroad.“

To launch the new currency, the CBI is planning a major ceremony early next year, which will be held at the ruins of the ancient city of Babylon. All major world leaders are expected to attend.

Current dinars will cease to be valid three months after the launch of the new notes, but up to that time they can easily be exchanged in person at any bank within Iraq; identification will be required and fingerprints will be electronically recorded.
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bs4ever

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 7:20 am

As much as I would like to believe this, is is simply and completely at odds with every currency screen I have found since reading this post. The Dinar has not changed at all.

I would be delighted if you could seriously open a can of whoop ass and prove me wrong,  but can you?

UPDATE

Just realised the date, walked straight into it


"आप सिर्फ यह है आप नहीं था क्या मतलब है यह देखने के लिए किया था"
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 8:00 am

oh shit...

it is April Fools day!

damn! now that is just fucking cruel


  

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NanneeRose
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 8:13 am

Oh yeah very funny, I'm in stitches!!


It's the simple things, small every day deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.......~Gandalf~



Come visit me at www.heleneanne.com
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PurpleSkyz
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 9:39 am

Just Try Not To Laugh Out Loud At These 25 Hilarious April Fools' Day Pranks
MARCH 28, 2015  —  By Bryan Galligan

  • share on facebook
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  • [url=http://www.viralnova.com/april-fools-pranks/?mb=vnnl&utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_term=Viralnova daily&utm_campaign=ViralNova Daily 2015-04-01#]pinterest [/url]
  • [email=?subject=Just%20Try%20Not%20To%20Laugh%20Out%20Loud%20At%20These%2025%20Hilarious%20April%20Fools%27%20Day%20Pranks&body=These%20pranks%20should%20give%20you%20some%20great%20ideas%20for%20April%20Fools%27.%0A%0Ahttp%3A%2F%2Fhilarous.viralnova.com%2Fapril-fools-pranks%2F%3Fmb%3Dvnnl%0A]email [/email]

April Fools' Day is one of those holidays that sneaks up on a lot of us. I usually don't realize what day it is until someone has already pranked me. Other more dedicated people spend weeks, even months, planning the gags they'll pull on their unsuspecting victims.
Whether you're looking for some inspiration for your own pranks or just want a good laugh - or 25 - these are sure to inspire and tickle your funny bone. And while it's safe to say no one really enjoys being pranked, we can all admit that watching someone else get pranked is pretty glorious.

1. Be sure to lock your office door the night before April Fools' Day.


Imgur

2. Now that's dedication.


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3. There's nothing worse than wanting a nice glass of orange juice and getting a mouthful of cheese water.


Imgur

4. Beware what's behind every door...


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5. You can't even trust your electronics.


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6. At least this prank provides plenty of reading material.


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7. Imagine biting into a caramel apple only to be greeted with a mouthful of onion. HELL!


Imgur

8. Yeah, this is one of those "definitely gonna be late for work" situations.


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We're just not sure your boss will buy the excuse...

9. I'm not even a cop and I can't say no to free donuts.


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10. "MUST ESCAPE!"


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11. At least you have an excuse not to get any work done.


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12. The one-two punch. An April Fools' classic.


Imgur

13. Fake spiders are a great way to get people to wet their pants.


Giphy

14. A dinosaur attack is a terrifying prank no matter what day it is.


Giphy

15. I call this one, "Welp!"


Giphy

16. Glass doors are the WORST.


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17. Just a little bit of height difference can make a prank work so much better.


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18. THEY'RE ALIVE.


Giphy

19. If one of your coworkers turns into a werewolf, your first thought should be, "Is it April Fools'?"


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20. This quickly went from the thrill of a lifetime to the shame that never fades.


ForGifs

21. Don't take a job interview on April Fools'...it's not worth the risk.


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22. I mean, it's a bad idea to fall asleep at work any day, but you really shouldn't leave yourself vulnerable on April 1st.


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23. Never camp with pranksters.


Giphy

24. "I just need to dry my hair..."


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25. Probably the scariest prank ever.


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Here are some simple ways to avoid being pranked on April Fools':
1. Don't go anywhere
2. Don't do anything.
3. Trust no one.
Easy enough, right?

Thanks to: http://www.viralnova.com


  

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NanneeRose
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 10:26 am

SO NO RV??  


It's the simple things, small every day deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.......~Gandalf~



Come visit me at www.heleneanne.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GetAnOilChange/
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PurpleSkyz
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 10:30 am

nope.... it is ALL a big joke.

exogen seems to think putting this crap out every April 1st is hilarious.

thanks yman for the reminder on how full of shit the whole RV scam actually is.


  

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 10:41 am



  

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 6:13 pm

Hahahahahahahahah yeah Yman!


It's the simple things, small every day deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.......~Gandalf~



Come visit me at www.heleneanne.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GetAnOilChange/
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MartyM

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Wed Apr 01, 2015 11:38 pm

PurpleSkyz wrote:
oh shit...

it is April Fools day!

damn! now that is just fucking cruel

Now there's an understatement... lol   




'Tis better to be thought a fool,than to speak and remove all doubt.
     Love,Laughter & Prosperity...  :Santa 3: 
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NanneeRose
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Thu Apr 02, 2015 6:14 am

Geez Marty where you been hiding? Happy Easter to you! xx


It's the simple things, small every day deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.......~Gandalf~



Come visit me at www.heleneanne.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GetAnOilChange/
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PurpleSkyz
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Thu Apr 02, 2015 8:51 am

Hey Marty! So nice to see you again. Hope all is well with you and yours. We do miss you around here. :)

You know yesterday morning when I first read this post I had just gotten up and had not had any tea or coffee yet and my reaction was knee jerk. As the day wore on I had to laugh at yman posting this here and then I actually came to the point of appreciation. I realized that I had lost my sense of humor. So to you yman I want to thank you.... besides reminding us what a joke the RV is you also reminded me that I had somehow lost the very part of myself that gets me through all the hard times.. my humor. Lesson learned.

I hope all is well with you and your family yman.


  

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Thu Apr 02, 2015 10:51 am



  

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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Thu Apr 02, 2015 11:23 am

Hi all, I have been in and out a few times (just not much to add), but been busy with Dad.
    We are well, waiting for snow to melt. we can actually see a few spots of what I think used to be grass (but it's not green). Most areas even out in the open still have at least a foot of snow, yet 20 miles south of us there's hardly any snow left.
   When I saw this post, I knew Nann couldn't resist, so I had to chime in... lol   Happy Easter to All !!




'Tis better to be thought a fool,than to speak and remove all doubt.
     Love,Laughter & Prosperity...  :Santa 3: 
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PostSubject: Re: "Worldwide Celebrations as Iraqi Dinar Revalues 1:1000!"   Thu Apr 02, 2015 6:27 pm

Hahahahaahahahahah I been good lately Marty! I am too tired nowadays to give 2 hoots about the stupid dinar LOL!  It's good to see you are still around tho!

:bouncy hearts:


It's the simple things, small every day deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.......~Gandalf~



Come visit me at www.heleneanne.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GetAnOilChange/
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