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A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama

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A Few Replies

Zen Gardner

A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama Quill-Pen-Senior-696x464 Senior writing letter with quill pen in homely wooden interior
by Zen Gardner
Well, things sure heated up after I published the story of my missing years. It was expected, I’ve lived with this from the inside and out most of my life and I know what triggers it sets off, especially if folks are mega-dosed with the more appalling revelations, which those videos and articles are designed to do.
I just wanted to get a quick follow up out there as the attacks against me are going viral and people need to see I’m fine and how I see this so far.
Some are calling for my head, but I have no need to defend myself. It was what it was and I got out, I tried to expose it then and after and have exposed similar dynamics in all of society ever since. Thankfully I’ve moved into new and amazing awareness and liberation which I will continue to share as effectively as possible no matter what some have decided to think of me.
It really doesn’t matter.
They have their issues to work out just as I do. As a good friend wisely said in answer to that email campaign sent out by someone to my private list and the attack articles he’s widely publishing;
“Thanks for your mail. The reason Zen came out with this is that he felt the need to do so as it did not feel good to write and not address this part of his past. He wants to come clean and that is it. But maybe there is more about it. I personally don’t think so but who knows. It is his own stuff he has to deal with and it doesn’t change my view of him at all. He told me about this part of his life a month ago and made me understand him better as I saw that there were clearly holes in his way of manifesting. I do not judge any of it , it is his “shit” to deal with. If he feels he has a reason to do this, fine with me; it is irrelevant to me and does not distract me at all. No judgement to the external in any way as the only focus I have is trying to understand my innerworld and trying to stay humble and connected and grounded. Judging anything in the external reality is a judgement on parts of the Self anyway. If something in the outside world triggers an emotion in me then that is a indication of attachment and need for healing inside of me and not in the outside world. I can only be thankful to the trigger outside me at that moment for giving me that opportunity.”

That’s a beautifully conscious response that puts things in their proper perspective, if you ask me. We all move on, hopefully, no matter what mistakes we’ve made in the past.

Irony and Double Standards

What’s sadly ironic is when someone leaves the massive military cult and realizes the error of their ways and turns against it they’re treated as heroes, even if they’ve murdered and maimed and a whole host of atrocities. And I agree with that treatment, it’s honorable and they were misled and horribly abused. They enlisted, by their own choice, at a young age and with very idealistic goals, and were brainwashed under duress to obey and follow orders with strong repercussions if they didn’t.
Similarly whistleblowers who were once part of corrupt systems are welcomed and encouraged.
Very few wake up from the military programming.  It would be too hard to face that the horror they committed was for nothing and they were used and abused, lied to and manipulated. Those who do wake up and make a stand, whatever crimes they’ve committed, are celebrated, and rightfully so.
The same can be applied to a whole host of hierarchical groups from religions to secret ops and societies to corporate and governmental command structures. The traps are everywhere.
How will you treat those who wake up and get out of those? Seems we have some work to do before we can call this a true awakening.

Willful Exceptions

That my situation is similar yet totally different in how people react even when I’ve had a complete and total reversal speaks to some very strong dynamics in not just society, but human nature. We seem to need someone to go after to release our rage and indignation, as well as fear. Witch hunting and the inquisition are examples of this, while attention was diverted from the horrific oligarchies and corrupt governments and leaders of their times. It speaks to unresolved personal issues in people as well that get triggered by a seemingly easy target, as mentioned in the first quotation.
It’s a sad statement of the human condition.
I want to thank all those who’ve sent words of understanding and encouragement, I’ve been overwhelmed with the sensitivity and compassion in the midst of such shocking news. It’s been a long road for me to get over all of this, but I realize it has hit many people hard and has thrown them into a tailspin, forcing them to re-evaluate everything I’ve said for so many years and even examining their own lives and skeletons in their closets and unresolved issues.
All this doesn’t diminish anything in my mind, what I’ve said and done and become came from the depths of my heart, and my past experience is largely what propelled me into joining the fray consciously with everything in me in the fight for humanity.
People can attach to me any perceived motive or agenda they want, but I mean everything I say, and will continue in my mission. If you examine the lives of many highly motivated people you’ll usually find serious traumas they had to overcome that made them into the fighters they became, in spite of their weaknesses and the heavy tragedies and traumas they had to carry in their hearts.

A Focused Fighter’s Response

I received an unsolicited reaction from Jon Rappoport that he has graciously given me permission to use as I saw fit. It says a lot, and comes from the heart of one such truth warrior.
“Here is what I have to say:
Under the trying and trapping circumstances, you did what you could.  You owe no apologies to anyone.
Your voice is strong.  It needs no guilt threaded through it.
The multitudes of people you address every day—the responsibility is on their shoulders to wake up if they can.  You’re giving everything you can to bring this about.
If there are nitpickers and “gotcha idiots” out there, ignore them.  They have no lives.
There are many people in this world who ought to confess to what they’ve done and what they’ve failed to do.  You are not one of them.
You’ve cleared that hurdle.  You’re way past that.
What we’re dealing with here are the sleeping billions.  That’s the target.  That’s the work and the game and the cosmic joke.  And in the process, we wake up more.
One way or another, people suck on the teat of guilt and use it for their own ends.  They need to see a man who won’t.  They don’t know that, but that’s what they need.
You’re on the high, high end of consciousness.  Way on the plus end.
So fuck it, and onward!

Where To?

Forward. That’s where. This has of course affected me deeply and I don’t fully feel the clarion clear call Jon mentions just yet as this has taken quite a toll on me, but it’s there in me. I won’t bend or back down, there’s no reason to. Some want more details and more groveling, an attitude is insatiable and extremely misdirected and coming from an unhealthy place as far as I’m concerned, and it’s very sad to see.
It’s not easy finding out who you’re friends really are and having people you intimately trusted turn on you, but these kinds of things come out under pressure, just like my disclosure. It’s all part of the lifting of the veil. But I’m not going to shirk what Universe is requiring of me to find my true whole self and get the healing I need in order to do the job set before me, especially when I’ve been going through what was already the biggest test of my life, but so be it.
It’s all part of the process.
And I’d like to add that it’s not me that put myself on a pedestal nor ever said I was perfect; it’s people’s projections. Another societal hang up. I’m fraught with flaws like anyone else, but at least whatever I set myself to do I give it my best shot and don’t sit on the sidelines criticizing those who act. I’m doing my best to realize my true conscious self and help change a desperate world despite my flaws and past mistakes, whatever they may be.
And for those with a morbid fascination for details and think I owe it to them, you need to do some serious self examination. I’ll say what I want to say and you can just wait. No doubt there will be a lot coming out as this is a perfect avenue to help the many who’ve suffered under similar circumstances. But I don’t owe you anything, you’re again coming from a very perverse and misguided way of thinking.
And anyone following me for some reason is headed for trouble and disappointment no matter what happens. We’re supposed to be following the path of truth, not people and projections we throw up to give our own sense of responsibility away. Another unconscious societally-induced reaction.
And if this offends anyone, tough. The truth does that sometimes. Get used to it. That’s just our stinking ego taking a hit, and that has to go.
I’ll weather all this fine. As Jon said I’m sorry for those getting waylaid by their pent up angst and lack of conscious understanding, but I’m not getting near that unconscious pain body reaction. It doesn’t help anyone.
I’m a very free man, free of guilt and shame, and owe no apologies. I’ve paid my dues more times than you could count. And this might be a shock to some, but it’s coming out at the right time. Let the chips fall where they may.
I’m fully committed to doing everything I can to help free a very bound and confused world. Of that I am very proud, and deeply honored to be part of, whatever the cost.
I gave up my own life a long time ago.
All the best,
In love, Zen
P.S. This information was forwarded to me just as I finished this article. Interesting, as these things always backfire and cause unnecessary confusion and problems, but such is the nature of lower level unconscious reactions. We should be beyond this, but so be it. We’ll all learn from it.
A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama Download-1-2 (Image from a different website, not from Steve Seymour below, initiator of all this “sensationalism” and now ironically having to cover his tracks and connections.
“Whoso digs a pit shall fall therein: and he that rolls a stone, it will return upon him.” – Proverbs 26:27)
“Determined to take an inch and stretch it a mile without a thought, except to create the next headline grabbing click bait. People start to make shit up and even try to associate established alternative media “celebrities” with wrong-doings – simply because they may have shared a stage, an interview or posted articles written by each other.
Absolutely ridiculous – but a useful indicator of the real motive behind the headline grabbing nonsense. This really will sort the wheat from the chaff. Clearly on display for all to see will be the brain-washed, the head-in-the-sand brigade, the sensationalists – desperate to get clicks for their latest trash half-truth made up bullshit. They start to mimic the Corporate Media they pretend to want to replace.” Read more …
Interesting it came around so quickly. “Hoist by his own pitard.”
More coming soon. I’m not going anywhere.
Love, Zen

Thanks to Zen at: http://www.zengardner.com




An Open Letter to Don Fergerson – aka Zen Gardner

We had a friendly internet camaraderie, it was only when I found out about your 27 year dance with an evil pedophilia cult that I had to stand up and say something – or I would be complicit in the cover-up, a cover-up that you played a big part in. You seriously scared our mutual friend with your confession and she was physically upset that she could have been so mislead by you over the time you had known each other.
You were a leader Zen – a leader in the Pedophile cult with a doctrine of separating children from their parents and teaching them to “service” their surrogate “nanny”.
There are so many accounts detailing the abuses suffered by children, teens and adults – all during the time when you were a leader, spokesperson, publicist and responsible for damage limitation when child abuse accusations started to damage the cult.
I think people would be interested in this video… A video about COG during the times you were there:


Also this post by Lynn – about dealing with the guilt.
How does one get over the guilt?
Well, my question is, how do you as a parent get over the guilt of allowing your children to be abused by other members of the family. Point in question is when I was in the Miami home with Dominique & Lily, Lily made it her personal goal to abuse my daughter Esther, 8 y/o, and Jonathan, 2 y/o. The home was trying to copy the Jumbo style where all the kids were herded like cattle into age grouping, so you only saw your kids for maybe 2 hours a day and @ meal time. My daughter was told not to tell me what she was doing. On one occasion she threw my 2 year old son into a wall because he was crying and on a daily basis would beat my daughter until she was black & blue on her butt and backs of her legs. Because I was in the main house and Lily was in her special house for leadership. Her actions drove my daughter Esther to going to the medicine cabinet and drinking isopropyl alcohol and taking entire bottles of aspirin & tylenol in hopes of being able to get sick so that she could be with me. When children got sick they would have their mother take care of them & Esther knew this. the really sad thing about it is that Esther didn’t tell me that this abuse was occurring until she was much older & we were no longer in the family. She said that the relief of being out of the family was enough to satisfy her, but the emotional scars that were left didn’t heal until much later, if at all.
Many folks say that abuse didn’t occur, but I personally witnessed horrible abuse in the form of corporal punishment with hangers, belts, switches, you name it, and also the verbal & emotional abuse. A child placed on silent restriction for 2 weeks cuz he has a devil because he talked back to an Auntie or Uncle, that’s a bit extreme. Or what about when my husband had sex with a 12 year old girl, Miracle, when we were in Puerto Rico in 1980. She’s the daughter of Rain & Rejoice. It’s positively disgusting that the family denies these abuses and tries to villify all of those that aren’t in the family any more. I’ve spent 13 years in christian counselling, etc. to try & recover from the 18 yrs. of abuse and brainwashing. The sad thing about those still in the family is they are totally oblivious to their demise and mental states.
[Source http://groups.able2know.org/xfamily/topic/770-1]
My motive was, and is, 100% clean and it was extremely difficult to have to be the one that revealed this hideous revelation. Now you want to attack me – I guess I can understand that – you’ve been outed.
But I did give you the opportunity to expose this in your own words, but you chose to water it down and paint yourself out to be the victim, just as people said you would – brush it away as just a thing in the past. If you were a victim and had escaped, then why did you return after getting out for a year? You were a leader Zen – a fucking leader – you had to enforce the rules and regulations – but now you are just a victim?…. sorry I don’t buy that. Have as much sex as you like between consenting adults – knock yourself out – but who looked out for the children Zen? Even your own son reveals more than he probably meant to in the very first line of his comment on your site.
So – here’s how it played out Zen – so stop making shit up about me.
Here is our email exchange. I haven’t included your emails to XXXXX, because I was shown them in confidence after I’d discovered some information for myself – you yourself asked if I could find out who you were – don’t forget.
My Original email to Zen after being contacted by my source…
Whats goung on with You and XXXXX  ? – she’s in a right state.
She’s got something to tell me but its breaking her apart…. WTF
What have you said to her – she said she’d tell me when she feel capable.
Zen’s reply…
Nor sure what to say to you Steve. I was 22 years old, wanted to change the world in the best way possible. 10’s of thousands like me experimented with alternative lifestyles, this one seemed to me to be the right thing at the time. It morphed, the worst part at the beginning was the hierarchical structure and control after some years, later it kept morphing but my intention was pure and it was very hard to break out. If you haven’t been there you’d never know. When it went totally weird I protested and got kicked out as a result. I suffered terribly, as did my family, but we survived. That you hold this against me like you are is quite startling, not allowing someone to change. What about Mark Passio being a witch? What about whistleblowers? Why I didn’t talk about this is self evident by your visceral reaction. All I can say is I’m a new person, and I thought you knew me.
My reply…
Have you any comprehension how sick the news made me feel – and poor XXXXX
You not a whistle blower – you have continued to cover it up until you dumped it on
XXXXX with instructions not to tell me.
At this point I sent him an ultimatum…
After seeing private emails to my source from Zen and other information which I cannot disclose at this time

And followed it up with…
Leave XXXXX out of this – its now between me and you.
So, you worked your way up through the ranks and became a leader in a notorious
religio kiddy fiddling and torture outfit The Family or Children of God.
You were there for 27 years – and yet you now claim you never did the fiddling despite gloating over some of the “Sharing the Love”. You witnessed torture and did nothing – and continued up the ranks You know my task is to flush this sort of shit out.
Hiding, covering up and whitewashing the filth and abuse will never sit with me – ever.  You were actually part of the “damage limitation” control.
So it comes down to this Zen or Don or what ever your name really is. You publicly reveal the full extent of you “working the way up through the ranks” to become a leader, you stop posting your fake “love and light” bullshit on the web, disappear never to be seen or heard of again in the alternative media.
Failing to do this will result in me doing it for you with a copy of the email that you unloaded on X – how dare you put that shit on X. All your email contacts that I have will receive the same information. It will be broadcast across the web, on all website that I have a hand in or know the webmasters. Facebook and Twitter.
I am not threatening any physical harm – I cannot be bought, waved off or threatened.
The one offer I am giving you is that you do this yourself so that you have at least some control over the content and how it is revealed. I have already put steps in motion so that if you fail to do this – all will be revealed to the whole “alternative media” in one hit.
You may reply to this email – either in agreement or refusal. That is the only contact I want.
Failing to reply to this email will result in a copy of this email being sent to your contacts and any others I know.
Your choice.
A follow up email to Zen, when my contact was being emailed by Zen and she was extremely upset and concerned for her safety.
I think you are in denial.
You will have got my final email by now.
up through the ranks – to become a leader – that’s complicit in anyone’s book.
I utterly disgusted, I try to expose this filth where ever I find it
You have had every opportunity to expose what you know/knew and experienced.
Why haven’t you – why dump that on XXXXX – what where you expecting. No wonder you didn’t tell me – and to think I let you into my house.
I have seen the Wiki about COG and The Family – if you haven’t I suggest you do.
I cannot begin to comprehend how sick the people in your perverse cult are.
You even post other pedophile exposing posts on your site.
All humans know intrinsically right from wrong.
You could expose the whole think with first hand knowledge – and close the filth down.
Then an email from me to Zen, after he emailed my source again. She was concerned for her safety fearing what Zen  would be capable of.
OK, I’ll wait. don’t bother XXXXX any more, she has been traumatized enough
with this. I have given you this chance – against my better judgment because I am not
vindictive and I want the best outcome for all concerned. I’ll be watching to make sure
you don’t suddenly become the hero – for I know more than you think.
I have not at this point revealed my source, emails between Zen and my source or the “other information” I am privy to.
Steve | Philosophers Stone

Thanks to: http://www.philosophers-stone.co.uk



‘Zen’ Gardner & Concepts Of Spiritual Warfare
Posted on August 15, 2016  by  Soren Dreier
Author: Soren Dreier
A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama Lion1-990x556

Dear Reader,
As I wrote yesterday: ‘And no more on this’ regarding the ‘Zen’ Gardner Revelations, there will be no more on this site regarding that matter, since I will not give it any more attention and it is not the purpose of my Dharma or this site. Don (Zen) is simply not that interesting to me.
He is but a flea barking in the presence of lions.
To me, there is a difference between fighting for what’s right and being a ‘right fighter’.
Fighting for what’s right is a spiritual thing. It comes from the Heart.
( Meaning – Not focused on Winning – Truth)
Being a ‘right fighter’ is an entirely different thing; it comes out of Ego.
( Meaning – Focused on Winning – Controlling)
When it comes to pedophilia, the Cult Zen was in and advanced in, was all about pedophilia and even Zen admits that (under severe pressure), but he claims to be the innocent bystander, which is not even a tiny bit  convincing. And I do not give sociopaths the benefit of doubt, since that is what they thrive on.
I have always put on my armor, saddled the horse, drawn my sword and gone into battle when kids get in harms way.
The vortex point in Spiritual Warfare is engage in battle and then walk away.
I had an episode some years ago with my son’s school.
Nasty, nasty abusive school it showed. They expelled him on a field trip from a restaurant, because he was a veggie, which they actually knew very well.  Later after dinner, they would go to the Theater to watch a play, which was part of the curriculum. It was in 10.th grade.
My son didn’t call home and complain, he walked around the City for hours in the coldest of December, without sufficient clothes and very, very hungry. What did he do?
He showed up at the Venue, his fascist teacher got surprised and asked him: “Are you still here?”
My son answered: “Of course – I like theaters.”
She was deeply shook and didn’t know what to do or say, his classmates noticed. Spiritual Warfare – Impressive. Next day he was crying his eyes out.
I told him:
I can go to the school now and raise Hell. That would be fighting without intention. Or, we can wait until you have your graduation in May, and we’ll Kung Fu them into oblivion.
He agreed. He trusted me.
May came along, and I instructed him to text me as soon he held his graduation paper in his hand, and I would unleash pure Spiritual Warfare Hell on them. I got the text, and bombed them with mails. The School did not survive and I’m very proud of my son. They would have if I had gone in angry from day one.
When you engage in a battle, you got to know when to start and when to stop, and not get ‘locked’ in on any result. Do what you have to do and then watch the process – never try to manipulate or control it. And again, this site isn’t about being a vortex point in the take down of Don or anyone else.
As I wrote long time ago: Every Warrior Has An Achilles Heel, you hurt kids on ANY level and you trigger mine.
I also wrote that I haven’t visited Don’s site for years. Last week, I emailed Don, before Steve or anybody knew about his past. Don and I have had our clashes in the past, but in some way, we got in contact maybe 4 – 5 times over a year. I got word that he was in Spain.
Bottom-line: No more of this. I said what I needed to say. Went into battle, raised my sword and am back in ‘Zen’ about it. The Real Zen – not the criminal who hijacked the concept – but the spiritual path.
Detaching and:  ‘live and let live’ or ‘die and let die’
Walk Away. The truth is out there, no matter what.
If you would like to follow this, go to my dear friends: Steve or Chautauqua. I know that more revelations will be published.
I will follow it obviously, taking the position of: “Being in this world but not of it.” It’s practical spirituality.
We all have to put our actions where our mouths and hearts are and this is not where mine is. I do not care about Don – He is now just another sociopath to me and they will NEVER admit to any wrong doings. It is just not in their DNA and a Heart they do not have. Won’t waste anymore time on these subhuman low life’s.
If you confuse this as me bailing out before it gets real nasty, you are in a misconception. I’m not into blood thirsty or revenge. My take on this matter reached the people it needed to reach, including Don and that is the result I aimed for.
© 2016 Soren Dreier / Feel free to share, only with link back

Thanks to: http://sorendreier.com



The Zen Of Now – Perception Matters

Gillian Grannum, Ph.D. – Given the volume of emails I’m receiving I’ve chosen to address my decision to support Zen publicly.
Yes. I’m aware of the articles discrediting Zen. I choose to see those deeply disturbing articles that strip a human down for his past and not his present choices as far less valuable to humanity than the content of the articles I’ve published from Zen.
Of course if you can provide me with proof that he is still a member of “The Family” and is actively engaged in pedophilia – an act he clearly states he has never committed – then my continued posting of his material is both unacceptable and wrong.  But without proof of current reprehensible acts I choose to perceive the light Zen has helped spread with his deeply thoughtful and uplifting articles as more valuable to humanity than the dark 3D matrix agenda that wants him silenced, scorned, shamed and discredited.
As far as I can tell part of Zen’s life challenges and personal growth consisted of joining a cult. Cult brain-washing and indoctrination turned him into a very slow Truth Perceiver/Awakened Being. By his own admission it took him 27 years to grow spiritually strong enough to see the truth and break away.
He’s castigated for being a leader of the cult and turning a blind eye to pedophilia and other cult crimes.  Are those cult activities worthy and wholesome? Of course not.  But guess what? He found the strength and courage to break free and he has used his life since then in constructive, uplifting pursuits.
It seems to me the Christ had some instructive advice concerning our penchant for condemnation.

A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama WomanStoned “And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst, 4They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. 5Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou? 6This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not. 7So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. 8And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground. 9And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. 10When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? 11She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.”
I shall be running re-posts of my favorite Zen articles for the foreseeable future.  I do this so that you can judge for yourself Zen’s character as expressed through his content. Judge THAT if you must judge something.
These are times when one must choose for oneself how to react to information. These are times to use great discernment.
For only the second time since I have had this blog the comments section will be closed. Consider my decision an act of self preservation from the ugly, ugly energies that simply want to tear down and destroy, maul and make tawdry all that was once perceived as very good.
And guess what?  It still is.

Thank you.
Originally published on Shift Frequency. Feel free to post far and wide.
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This is The Devastation That ‘Zen’ Gardner Left Behind
Posted on August 15, 2016 by Soren Dreier
Author: Video / Soren Dreier
A Few Replies by Zen Gardner and more Zen Drama Dawn

This is the Devastation of The Cult of Don/Zen, and he chose to write about:
Love, ‘We are all one’ on the God Damn Internet. No ‘Zen’- ´WE’  are all BROKEN…..
Now go to his site and tell him how much you adore him and forgive him.
Forward to the intervention with Dawn 50 minutes in :


Thanks to: http://sorendreier.com



There are no words to describe people who are involved in such things.

The truth will out.


The comments on Zens site are totally being censored from what is being said elsewhere. On Chautaugua's site the comments are very interesting. I never knew why all of the regulars left Zens clique the past few years. Now I do. He banned Peaks for challenging him on the love & light bullshit. Same with Chaut. I also have many issues on the way this whole sordid internet outing episode started. As for Don/Zen being in a known pedophile cult in a leadership role for 27 years and not knowing what was happening to his own and all of the other kids I call total bullshit on. So I do understand the righteous indignation that is being shared.

Some of these guys are so obvious as to their games they play.... Zen's wasn't. It was hidden and then forced out into the open. His reactions seem smug and insincere which only adds fuel to the fire.

Well at least he can always fall back on the methodology of control he used in covering up child rape at his job during his missing years. That skill should come in handy for him now as he tries to cover and spin his truth.


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